Dear Nikki,
Waow I am suprised at myself that I am still writing a blog. I am not much of a writer but somehow I can talk to you about things that I usually keep to myself. Now since you've left me, I still have the habit to write to you even though I don't expect any replies,or you even viewing my blog.
Have you ever worried about the future? Your plans? What you going to do in a few years time. I see most human being doing the same thing. Infancy,growing up,school,get engaged,married and get old. Is that there is to it about life as a human. I am always wondering about that. I pondered myself as I sit by the desk staring at the empty ceiling. My life has been real simple. I went through a lot of hardships. Well me and my family did. It took us a lot of hardwork to reached this comfort living. I now have a great career, and I am happy in what I am doing but sometimes I feel bored because of the daily things that I do everyday on my day off. I sometime worried that all these things will be taken away from me, and I am left with nothing. These feelings really worried me even worse than my insecurities when I am with you.
The church says that you should trust God with all your heart, and he will provides. I do trust him but sometimes I have doubts. What does that mean? Is it because I don't pray enough,go to mass enough?
What is happiness to you Nikki? Sometimes I don't even know the answer......
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